/I'll live without you love.../

I can’t hold it in any longer. It burning up my insides.

so this weekend was amazing. mainly sunday, amazing nonetheless.

it all felt wrong yesterday. being in his room, and laying on his bed.

i shouldn't have been there, and i don't ever want to be there again. EVER.

i know we made the best decision to stop talking completely.

-don't call me.

-i definately will not call you.

it's just sad, we used to be so close. but obviously we've grown apart.

i don't regret anything that has happened, it's made me who i am.

it's made me stronger than i could have ever imagined.

fear before the march of flames anyone?

that's what i thought... :P

"The Changing Of Scenery"

So you're just the beaten down train tracks that cover the filthy ground.

And that trains on it's way again, I hear it's whistling sound. (defeat!)

And you're just like the leaves, you fall and you fade.

And me; I'm just the mud-- getting covered by everything.

But you're footsteps are flowers, yes, you've bloomed in my heart.

I just keep asking myself, "Do we end, or do we start?"

And on a day like today, you're the sun behind the clouds,

(You wear that mask so proud!)

And I'm just hoping to see you, screaming, "Please, please come out!"

But no, you just hide away; transform to miserable rain.

I'll soon be your shadow, a few hopeful memories.

..........But now I'm just something written;

Some simple words on a page.

A possible verse or chorus that no one ever sang.

Well now you're a bit ashamed; cause you could have wrote me down first.

But you're voice, it's just a blessing, and I'm it's only curse.

---------------------------------------

i heard the saddest country song on my way to school this morning. i might be lame, but it goes like this...

"It's Getting Better All The Time"
I don't stop breathing everytime the phone rings,
My heart don't heart don't race when someone's at my door,
I've almost given up thinking you're ever gonna call,
I don't believe in magic anymore,
I just don't lie awake at night,
Asking God to get you off my mind.

It's getting better all the time,
it's getting better all the time.

Yeah I got to work on time again this morning,
This old job is all that I got left,
And no one even noticed I'd been crying,
At least I don't have whiskey on my breath,
Yeah I think I'm gonna make it,
'Cause god won't make a mountain I can't climb.

It's gettine better all the time,
It's getting better all the time.

God I hope you're happy,
Girl I wish you well,
I just might get over you
But you can't ever tell

I always thought I'd do something crazy,
If I ever saw you out with someone else,
But when the moment came last night,
I couldn't say a word,
I stood there in the dark all by myself,
Yeah I could have said a million things,
But all I did was keep it locked inside.

It's getting better all the time,
It's getting better all the time,
It's getting better all...the time.

and

it's so pretty.

february.the snow falls down melts before it even hits the ground and i'm standing here listening to the sound of your hand washing back and forth across my filthy heart and i don't know if i should say "i'm sorry" or "thank you" i try to speak but the tears choke the words and i think i finally know what they mean when they talk about joy.

<cite> www.livejournal.com/users/lettersfor_drew

go visit it! (cause i probably won't update this very much anymore!) :-P

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So leave a comment if you'd like to be my friend.